I’ve been in the goth/subcultural scene for a while, 15 years to be exact, and the music has been a comforting constant to me. I don’t really like labeling people, or myself, since there is so much more to every person than just one thing. And that goes for all labels; illnesses, career choices, sexual orientation etc. I have always been attracted to opposites, to get to know people who don’t look like a clone of me, the excitement in being different to one another. Safe to say, I’ve never really cared about conformity.
BUT. When I have to describe myself to someone and I want them to get an overall good look at me, I usually start with this, and I guess it’s a pretty good way to present my anonymous self to readers on this blog as well:
I’m a car crash of metal and goth, with punk blood and industrial guts spewing over the steering wheel. I have a life-long fascination with horror and the occult, I love all kinds of animals and I’m extremely outdoorsy.
I discovered my mom’s old punk records at age 13 and never looked back. The music was raw, powerful and the punk scene was so allowing. Through punk I came in contact with people who listened to death metal, goth and industrial plus all the sub-genres in between and the music is now the second longest love of my life.
If someone on the street calls me a rocker (it happened today, a middle age couple walked passed me and thought I looked like “a cool rocker”!) I don’t disagree. When someone asks if I’m a goth girl I say that I am. If someone calls me a punk rocker, it’s ok as well. If someone confuses me with emo, kawaii or visual kei, I usually just say that I don’t listen to much of that music. Because that’s the thing, it’s not about clothes. It’s not about make up. To me, it’s all about the music. The music I listen to at the moment represents the way I feel and the way I feel is reflected in the way I dress. And hey! As long someone is being nice and try to compliment, who am I to get pissed just because they aren’t into the same thing as I am?